Often, we find ourselves attempting to plan and control every aspect of our lives in hopes of positive outcomes and utmost productivity. In pursuing happiness, success, and fulfillment, the notion of control always takes the forefront, convincing us that we must strategize what we do and how we utilize our energy to shape the outcome of our days, weeks, and lives.
Recently, I came across a question that changed my view of control and perspective: What if, by embracing variance and redefining our perspective, we can achieve greater opportunities for growth and success?
I concluded that true success lies not in control, but in letting go of the need to micromanage every aspect of our lives and trusting in the natural flow of existence. By releasing our grip, we open ourselves up to infinite possibilities. When I hit a low point in my mental health a couple of years ago, I planned my days in my notes app starting from 5:00 AM to 10:30 PM, ensuring there wasn’t a minute of downtime, not realizing that I was burning myself out and would eventually crash. Scheduling every hour of my day drove me to exhaustion and robbed me of the spontaneity and joy that life has to offer. Instead of constant stress and planning, I learned to go with the flow and only schedule the necessary events, leaving time to relax and do things I genuinely enjoy.
Acknowledging Variance and Redefining Perspective:
In acknowledging variance (which comes with embracing contrast) and redefining my perspective, I acknowledged that today holds beauty not only in its positive aspects but also in the variance provided by the “bad.”
By redefining my perspective, I learned to see value and opportunity for growth in every experience, whether perceived as good or bad. It was during this challenging period of constant planning and exhaustion that I began to redefine my perspective and recognize that success isn’t about how much we can control but how willing we are to surrender to the unknown and embrace the present moment.
Rather than viewing setbacks as obstacles to be avoided, I learned to see them as opportunities for growth and transformation. I embraced the spontaneity of life, allowing me to discover a sense of freedom and peace. Letting go of the need for control doesn’t mean surrendering responsibility or ambition, but finding a balance between action and acceptance.
Our perspective, shaped by our thoughts and beliefs, plays a powerful role in how we experience this in life. In a world dominated by negativity, especially on social media, it’s essential to have a mindset of positivity and optimism to discover this sense of peace. By focusing on the beauty and potential for growth and learning in every experience, we can transform even the most challenging situations into opportunities for personal development and growth, eventually manifesting positive opportunities in our lives.
The 5 rule has helped me with this, which is that if something won’t affect you in 5 days, weeks, months, or years, let it go and focus your energy on what matters in the present. This approach encourages mindfulness and prioritization, helping you to avoid getting caught up in negative emotions that may not serve your long-term well-being. It’s important to keep moving and not dwell on the little things to transform even the most challenging situations into opportunities for personal development and growth.
Releasing control and finding this sense of peace requires patience and trust in the natural course of events. It’s important to trust that even when things don’t go according to our plans, something better might be coming. This realization has taken me years to come to terms with, and I still find myself struggling with this idea of patience. I eventually learned to take a step back and recognize that once I let go and release pressure on myself, I can attract so many amazing opportunities, experiences, incredible people, and new perspectives that I wouldn’t trade for the world.
Though it’s natural to feel iffy about letting go and releasing control, especially in a world that often emphasizes the importance of planning and certainty, I’ve found that with each passing day, I continue to develop this sense of trust. Knowing that trying to control every aspect of my life only leads to stress and frustration, compared to letting go of control, brings a sense of freedom and peace. As I continue to grow with this mindset, I find myself more resilient in the face of challenges and more open to the opportunities that present themselves unexpectedly. I’ve learned to appreciate the beauty of spontaneity, and while there may still be moments of doubt or hesitation, I remind myself that true growth often occurs outside my comfort zone.